All About Ben

I'm 39 today. Seems strange. I feel so young and so old at the same time. I feel pretty much the same way I did when I was younger, I don't think my views have changed that much, but I certainly see the difference between me and a 'twenty something'. Then there is the physical - it's hard to say if it is because I am out of shape and over weight or just getting old. My body certainly feels old. Can't imagine what another 39 years will do to this body. I realize now that most of my friends are in their 40s and 50s and I guess this is kinda mid-life. It's weird. I was saying to Mary the other day after we saw 'the year of magical thinking' in NY that we are at the edge of that time when we will experience loss more often. Both parents and friends are aging and we are going to start losing people at an accelerated pace. And then I look at Ben. He is so full of life and health - and I am so grateful for him. I never could have imagined or predicted what my 39th birthday might look like. Even though I feel kinda contemplative today, I am overwhelmingly grateful for my life.

posted by BensMom04 @ 6:47 AM